Fire in My Chest

Too often, I find myself buried in a wave of false excuses and burdensome emotions. These turn into shackles that drag behind me. As they increase, each step grows more labored until I collapse. In these moments, I find the resolve to cut loose and walk free.

Only to repeat the same pattern again. And again.

And again.

I promise each time, this will be the last time. And it never is. I stopped promising and started hoping. Here’s to another moment of re-dedication. Here’s to hoping next time will be better, shorter, easier. I’m done assuming that this will be the last time, but I simply wish for progress. One day at a time.

I have fire in my chest; I have dreams to complete; I wont let myself stop me forever. It’s a vicious cycle, a cliché, if you will, and I’m ready to break it. One chain at a time.

I’ll be here again soon, but maybe next time I’ll find some new ember added to the fire.

Man on fire, hoping to avoid the rain.


2 thoughts on “Fire in My Chest

  1. I feel the same way most of the time. I’ve been stuck in a rut the past few weeks. I’ve made shitty, unfair comparisons between myself and my more successful friends. I’ve let those excuses drag me down. I’m not clever enough, I don’t have the same drive they do. But in the end, that’s something that I decide. I have ambitions so grand that I feel no one (i.e. my family) believes that I will achieve them.
    But I decided today that I would pick myself up again. Work harder. Dream bigger than ever before. Imagine myself in the position I want to be in, then expect a self-fulfilling prophecy. I would leave the people behind who doubt me.
    I hope whatever you are struggling with passes, and that you do find that ember that rekindles the flame. Best of luck to you.

    • Doug says:

      If you scan through this poor excuse for a blog, you’ll see that’s been my single most debilitating struggle over the past year.
      One of these days, we should share a longer conversation on such things.
      I’m glad to hear you’re moving forward, upward. Keep it up; forget those that say you can’t.
      Everything I’ve been stuck in tends to roll in waves, so I’ll be back here soon, but I hope I spend less time down next time.
      At the end of the day, we are our own worst enemy. The only person standing between you and your dreams is yourself. You got this, it just takes a 1 part dedication to 2 parts time. Dedication and patience, we’ll get there eventually.

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